Here we have another post from Prague, this time about one of the more interesting food finds of my trip--and definitely the most interesting tour that I've ever had. Rather than join the regular Sanderman tours that I usually take, which I highly recommend ), I followed my hostel's recommendation and joined a local walking tour that was run by a local Czech woman, for "a more personal tour from someone who has lived in Prague,"
I arrived at the Old Town Square to the designated meeting point, and found a middle aged woman, who looked mildly disheveled, but was holding the umbrella that corresponded to the tour group I was looking to join. I asked her if she was the guide, which she quickly confirmed. I realized at this point, that I hadn't had anything to eat and probably wouldn't last the 4 hour walking tour. So, I asked if I have time to get some food, but she told me I didn't have much time. I originally wanted to get a sausage, but the line was too long so I settled on Langose. Langose is just fried dough brushed with garlic butter, and topped with cheese and a bit of hot sauce.
Surprisingly, it's actually very delicious! They're hand made at the booth from balls of dough that are stretched out then deep fried. The Langose is nice and crispy on the outside, and chewy on the inside--but what really made it so good was the garlic butter.
Getting back to the story, after I got back from grabbing a snack, our tour guide told us-- there were 3 of us at this point--that we were moving locations. We moved over to the atomic clock, suspiciously close to another walking tour group. I quickly realized what she was doing--she was stealing customers.
People would come up and ask if she was the walking tour guide and she'd just say yes. Only after the other tour group left did she tell us that she wasn't part of the other group. She proudly told us how it was false advertising when the other group advertised "free walking tours" when they expected a tip after, and added that she was honest by naming her tour "Tips walking tour".
The tour promptly went downhill from there.
She told us that even though she was born in Prague, she escaped to Switzerland during the communist era and only returned recently. After learning that a pair of ladies on our tour were from Switzerland as well, she struck up a rapport and spoke almost exclusively to them, other than muttering a few words to the rest of us every so often. We'd awkwardly run into the other tour group at most of the stops, which she'd try and avoid then complain about after they had left.
The crowning point of the tour had to be at Prague Castle, where we stopped to watch the changing of the guards. Before the changing she told the rest of use to watch out for "those shifty Japanese", as she pulled her eyes with her fingers to make them more "Asian". She told us how they like to bud in front to get a better view, and to give them a firm kick if they tried. I couldn't help but stand there slack jawed in disbelief and wondered if she realized I was Asian.
Yet, this gets better. As the changing of the guards started, we heard our tour guide yelling at someone off to the side. She proudly told us afterwards that a Czech woman had tried to get in front of her, to which she asked, "Where did you get your tickets?" The woman then told her to screw off--which our tour guide replied to with a hearty "F__K off, and die on the side of the road."
The others in our group couldn't wait until the end of the tour to ask the rest of us if we thought was equally horrible, so we all went and complained about her many quirks over a beer afterwards. I actually ended up taking the other "free tour" the next day, which ended up being MUCH better. As much as I avoided getting her in my pictures, I do have a shot of half of her showing us the peeing fountains and at Wenceslas Square. Look for the bright green.
- Donnie the Foodie
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